At the Akatsuki base, Konan, Yahiko, and the others were still deep in training with Nagato's shadow clones, their shouts echoing through the cavern like a group of kids trying to win at dodgeball with lethal force.
"Okay, everyone stop for a moment. I will introduce your new member, and she will become your instructor. Her name is Pakura and she comes from Sunagakure. Also, she's a hero in the Second Ninja World War — but I don't know what the Kazekage was thinking. They sent her to please their enemies. So she joined us," Nagato explained, shrugging like a man who just found a legendary kunoichi in the clearance bin.
Everyone stared. Konan blinked twice. Yahiko's clone scratched its head. Someone in the back whispered, "Did he say please their enemies? Like… snacks and back rubs?"
Meanwhile, Nagato's mind was still on recruitment. The old days of the Third Ninja War had given him options — Kisame, Kakuzu, defected talents apleunty. But this timeline? Drier than a Suna-themed comedy club.
Sakumo — suicide.
Pakura — now with them.
Tsunade — still bouncing between sake bottles and casinos.
Jiraiya and Orochimaru? Out of the question. One was too loyal, and the other didn't have a bottom line, only a never-ending wishlist of human experiments. Trying to recruit Orochimaru was like hiring a mad scientist as your babysitter.
But right now? The new focus was Tsunade. Use Kawaki to get her. Use Tsunade to get Sakumo. Use Sakumo to trigger a nationwide existential crisis in Konoha.
So Nagato arrived in Tanzaku Quarter — the Las Vegas of the ninja world. Why Tanzaku? Because it was lawless, easy to find information, and basically a magnet for war veterans with gambling addictions and low impulse control.
Nagato changed his appearance into adult-mode — tall, brooding, 100% drip — and headed into the loudest pub in the city, where information was passed around like sake on payday.
He walked up to the bartender like a man on a mission.
"Female gambler who's lost 90% of her money."
The bartender didn't even blink. He looked like he'd heard stranger things today — probably involving a monkey stealing someone's pants.
He thought for a moment. "Two streets from here to the left. Tenth building."
Nagato threw some coins and vanished like a responsible ghost.
Arriving at the building, he found Tsunade mid-gamble, eyes locked on the dice as if willing them to love her back. Shizune stood behind her like a disappointed chaperone.
Nagato didn't wait. He casually strolled behind Shizune, patted her shoulder like an old friend saying hello at a funeral, and teleported them outside.
"East, 10 kilometers."
Shizune instinctively tried to punch him into next week, but he was already gone. Tsunade, realizing something was wrong, immediately bolted after them like a very angry, very powerful mother bear.
"Worthy of a Sannin," Nagato murmured, watching her approach. In front of him stood Tsunade — annoyed, confused, and mildly homicidal.
Shizune wasn't hurt — not exactly. She was bound to a wooden stake, next to a table that also looked very... earthy.
'Is Grandpa cheating behind Grandma again?' Tsunade thought, eyeing the wooden décor with suspiciously Senju vibes.
Tension hung in the air like a poorly-written romance subplot.
"Are you Grandpa's illegitimate grandson?" Tsunade asked, voice razor-sharp.
Nagato's forehead twitched. Table-flipping urge: 90%.
"No," he said.
"Then how did you get Senju bloodline?"
"Stole it from some thieves two months ago."
Tsunade blinked. That wasn't in the bingo book.
'Pot King Danzo,' he thought. 'This pot, you must hold tightly.'
She didn't understand. And then…
BOOM.
Tsunade punched the table into oblivion.
"Did you dig up my Grandpa's grave!?" she yelled, full fury unlocked.
"Not me," Nagato said coolly, already summoning a new table. "I told you. I stole it from thieves. They dug him up."
"Who was it?"
"Well... your teacher's best friend."
BOOM. Another table gone. Another summoned. The forest furniture industry was thriving.
"So what do you want from me?" Tsunade snapped, turning back to free Shizune.
"Join us."
"Not interested."
"I will offer you something."
"Still not interested."
"N–A–W–A–K–I."
BOOM.
The table groaned spiritually.
'Table: War comes and goes, but I stay eternal.'
"What did you say?" Tsunade narrowed her eyes.
"If you join us, I'll give you Nawaki. Alive. Not Edo Tensei. Flesh and blood Nawaki."
She stared at him. "How do I know you're not lying? I don't even know you."
"Then go," Nagato said. He released Shizune, lowered her gently, and stepped back. "I'll wait five minutes."
Tsunade picked up Shizune. "I will go. But if you're lying, I will kill you."
"Sure. Here — Chain of Oath. If you betray or leave us, your memory about us, our ninjutsu, everything — gone. How about her?" He pointed at Shizune.
Tsunade thought. Konoha wasn't safe, not anymore. "She's coming with me."
A moment later, they warped again.
"Why are we back in Konoha?" Tsunade and Shizune asked at the same time.
"Recruit new member," Nagato said simply.
A black line popped up on Tsunade's forehead.
She stared at him. "You just dragged one Sannin out of retirement, and now you're going for another? Why not just apply to be Hokage at this point?"
Elsewhere in Konoha:
"Civilian A: Did you hear? Sakumo failed his mission and made Konoha lose a lot."
"Civilian B: Yeah. He should commit suicide."
"Civilian C: Totally agree."
Not far from the gossip trio, Tsunade heard it — and froze.
"What happened to Konoha while I was gone?!" she muttered. "How can civilians know classified failures?! He fought in the Second Ninja War — you think he doesn't have enough merit to fail once?"
Shizune whispered, "You don't mean to recruit… Mr. Sakumo, right?"
"Why not?" Nagato answered. "He's more popular than the Hokage. That's a threat. Your higher-ups don't like threats. So they slander him, break him, and bury him. Dead men tell no tales."
They reached Sakumo's house.
Teleportation again — now standing before the White Fang himself.
"Who?" Sakumo asked, instantly on guard.
"I am Nagato, leader of the Akatsuki. I want to invite you to join us," Nagato said, as direct as a kunai to the point.
"Not interested," Sakumo said. His voice was calm, but there was steel beneath it. Despite everything, loyalty still lived inside him.
Nagato didn't flinch. "No need to rush your answer, Mr. Sakumo. But you know how this ends. They'll kill you. Maybe you're not afraid of death. But what about your son? He's a genius. In two or three years, he'll know the truth. Do you trust the higher-ups not to silence him too?"
Sakumo's breath hitched.
Nagato pressed on. "Also, our new member? Still one of the Three Sannin."
"Who?" Sakumo asked. His mind reeled. Jiraiya? Orochimaru? Tsunade?
He turned slowly.
And there she stood — Tsunade, arms folded, expression unreadable.
"...You've got to be kidding me