"This place ain't bad. Way better than that dusty sandbox they call a public training ground."
Guts stepped into Konoha's private indoor training facility and stretched his arms with a satisfying crack.
Sure, it didn't have marble floors or butlers handing out water bottles, but compared to the chaos outside? This was paradise. Or at least... less of a dump.
Behind him stood a very pouty Kurenai, huffing and fixing her hair that had been frizzed up from their earlier "friendly" spar.
She looked like a cat that had just been caught in the rain—angry, disheveled, and ready to scratch.
She glared at Guts's back like it owed her money.
"You actually call this training? Illusion ninjas are supposed to be refining their minds or battling genjutsu masters, not dodging sharp flying death!"
Guts turned around mid-stretch and raised a brow.
"What, training's only real if you're sitting cross-legged and humming?"
He didn't know much about genjutsu, but even he knew chasing kunai like it's dodgeball probably wasn't the textbook method for illusion-types.
Not that he cared. Theory didn't dodge weapons—legs did.
After all, not everyone could be a walking cheat code like Uchiha Itachi.
Kurenai crossed her arms and let out the most judgmental "Hmph!" known to mankind.
She wasn't about to admit she was just curious about his training. No way.
Guts shrugged. He had better things to do than decode tsundere girl behavior. Like surviving what he was about to put himself through.
He stepped into the middle of the hall and started messing with the training gear like a man preparing for war.
Kurenai, arms still crossed, leaned against the wall but kept sneaking glances. Not because she was curious. Definitely not.
She just didn't want him to accidentally blow up the building.
Then—click.
Ceiling panels creaked open like they had something very pointy to say.
Whizz!
Kunai shot out like angry bees with abandonment issues.
"Soru."
With a single word, Guts moved.
No—disappeared.
A gust of wind cracked where he stood, and he reappeared two meters to the right like it was nothing. The kunai struck the ground behind him with a series of violent thunks.
"Whoa, was that... Body Flicker?" Kurenai blinked.
Before she could even process, another volley launched from a different angle.
Whizz! Whizz!
More kunai. More death.
More Guts not giving a damn.
He dodged again. Then again. And again.
He was moving so fast, it was like watching someone teleport—but it wasn't ninjutsu. She squinted.
Wait a second...
This wasn't the Body Flicker Technique. No chakra flow. No afterimage.
It was raw, terrifying leg strength. A blur of pure physical movement—footwork so fast it kicked up air currents.
It was like watching taijutsu on caffeine.
How absurd did your body have to be to invent a technique like this?
Kurenai watched in stunned silence, arms no longer crossed.
For a guy who trained like a gorilla who was about to 1vs 100 Humans, he had frightening precision.
[Template: Monkey D. Garp — Completion: 10.92%]
By the end of training, Guts looked like he'd just walked through a typhoon—shirt soaked, hair dripping, satisfied grin on his face.
"Uncle Shinku's out of the village," he said, stretching his back with a groan.
"Wanna grab some dinner? My treat."
Kurenai blinked like she just got slapped with a fish.
"You're inviting me? To eat?"
Her brain did the math.
Guts + Eating = Bankruptcy.
"…Are you planning to eat, or just watch me starve while you feast like a beast?"
"Of course I'm eating!" he snapped.
"What kind of monster do you think I am?"
Kurenai tilted her head. "Alright then. Now I have to see what you're feeding me. Let's go, Big Appetite."
She didn't trust him.
But she was curious.
Also, she was kinda hungry.
One Hour Later – Forest River Outside Konoha
The scent of roasted meat drifted through the forest clearing, mixing with the crackle of firewood.
The sun had dipped below the trees, casting everything in a warm, golden hue.
Kurenai Yuhi sat cross-legged on the grass, staring at the whole roasted wild boar turning slowly over the campfire. Her expression?
Complicated.
This was... not what she expected when a boy invited her to eat.
Earlier that morning, she'd seen Asuma and the others heading off with girls like Nohara Rin and Kato Shizune. Normal boys. Normal dates. Restaurants. Sweet talk. Maybe even a flower or two.
And here she was—deep in the woods, roasting boar like some jungle survivalist.
The first time she'd ever eaten with a boy, and it was… this.
She glanced at Guts, who was cheerfully hacking away at the boar with a kunai like a caveman who'd just discovered tools. He wasn't exactly romantic. Or graceful. Or even clean, really.
But there was something oddly sincere about it.
"What are you staring at?" Guts raised an eyebrow and nodded at the fire.
"Eat before it gets cold."
Despite his usual rough edges, he had done his best to be polite. He'd sliced the meat into bite-sized pieces and even rinsed flat stones in the river to serve them on. Primitive, sure, but weirdly thoughtful.
Luckily, Kurenai wasn't one of those stuck-up princess types. She picked up the chopsticks Guts had carved (badly) from branches, grabbed a piece of meat, and popped it into her mouth.
"Mmm!" Her eyes lit up. "This is… actually really good!"
Guts smirked. "Told ya."
Truth be told, the meat was only lightly salted and nowhere near as seasoned as the food from the village barbecue place she'd gone to with her friends.
But this wasn't about taste.
It was about the moment—the firelight, the crisp evening air, the two of them sharing a meal in the middle of nowhere.
It felt… kind of special.
Kurenai was happily chewing away when she noticed Guts slice off a long, sausage-like strip of meat. It looked different from the others.
Curious, she leaned forward and asked,
"Hey, what cut is that?"
Guts froze mid-slice.
He blinked at the meat, then at her, clearly trying to find the right words. After an awkward pause, he cleared his throat.
"That's, uh… pig whip."
"Pig whip?" she echoed, tilting her head. "You mean the tail? I've never heard it called that before."
"Y-Yeah," Guts nodded quickly, eyes darting away.
"That's what it is. Pig tail. Totally normal. You wanna try?"
Kurenai nodded eagerly. "Sure, I'll give it a shot."
But Guts didn't move.
She frowned. "Well? Aren't you gonna give it to me?"
"Eh... probably not a good idea," he muttered. "Girls shouldn't eat that kind of thing."
"Huh?! Are you looking down on me?" she snapped. "Why can boys eat it and not girls?"
She looked ready to jump across the fire and snatch it from his hands.
Guts winced. He couldn't exactly tell a little girl that she was about to eat a pig's dick.
Even he had limits.
Desperate, he blurted out, "Fine! It's the tail, sure—but it's the part pigs use to grow beards!"
"…Grow beards?" Kurenai blinked.
"Yeah!" he nodded, doubling down on the nonsense.
"If girls eat it, they might get a mustache."
Kurenai's face turned pale.
"No thank you!" she blurted, recoiling as if he'd just offered her poison.
Guts snorted and popped the piece in his mouth himself. "Told ya."
Kurenai scowled across the fire. "You're such a weirdo…"
But her voice was softer than usual.
And behind that scowl?
A smile she didn't even realize she had.
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