Cherreads

Why the Hard Working God Can't seem to be Promoted

YureitheGhost
7
chs / week
The average realized release rate over the past 30 days is 7 chs / week.
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Synopsis
Calm is a hard working and honest to good God, yet for some unfortunate reason he just can't get promoted! what the hell!
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Chapter 1 - The God of Nothing

The endless expanse of the deep, dark void appeared to be such, endless and expansive, perhaps the only qualities an endless and expansive space could actually truly have. Yet even if that was the case, and in this situation that was true, it would not actually be the totally correct state of the realm. For situated inside the void, seemingly nowhere and everywhere all at once, sat an endless amount of colossus structures. Platforms breaking the conceived, established norms of this void, for these structures did not care, and thus were not beholden to the rules and etiquette of the ostensive, endless and vast realm. 

The void existed, or more accurately, possibly or probably existed, depending on who asked or looked, in between states of existence. Not in the quaking and living realms of existence, nor above or below in the realms of inexistence, but simply in the space in between. For these unlikely structures, and thus the void itself, were inhabited by creatures that didn't need a reason or explanation for the state of being, they were inhabited by the Gods themselves. 

The titanic structures floated meaninglessly in the void. Albeit, the structures themselves were far from meaningless, they were grand and opulent, magnificent and formidable, if perhaps a little outlandish. Made of the most magnanimous of flawless white marble, smooth and elegant, forming grand pillars of opulence. Piercing the sky, these pillars formed stable foundations for large platforms to rest in between them. Grand arches leading into tall, elaborate building and abodes, high walls forming the most exquisite of domicile. The towering behemoth structures bequeathing rise of grand acropolis, mighty fortresses of existence.

Inside these fortresses, all manner of scenery and residence congregated, showcasing the divine creativity and fastidiousness of its makers. Prominent waterfalls falling down magnificent hills, plunging into breathtaking lakes, rolling fields of greenery and all manner of colour of flower. Promenades of impeccable taste and design giving way for wide, flawless streets adorned by all manner shop and dwelling. The beautiful ringing of voices accentuating the flawlessness and liveliness of the interior. People sang and laughed and enjoyed the everlasting, heavenly aura of the seemingly improbable existence offered by the structure, for it was the Grand Citadel, the center of the universe and of existence.

But beneath that, beneath all of that, all of the opulence and grandeur, the beauty of nature and life, down farther and farther, lower and lower, below where the water emptied out, below the last arching bridge and cobblestone walk, even below the lowliest of billet or accommodation, or even the most mundane storage closet, rested a strange, bulbous knob jutting out of the bottom of the citadel. It was rotund, bulging and seemingly patched in multiple locations. On many occasion this bulge was froth with relentless and abrasive activity, loud and electric it was hard to miss or ignore, if of course you were also found floating in the void around the Citadel, which most in existence certainly have not had the privilege, or lack of privilege to experience.

Right now however, a certain event, on a certain day was taking place, inside a certain room, a certain voice was ringing out, which was certainly being ignored by a certain young man. For today a particular thing was happening, it was a staff meeting, and for the young man, whose entire head and shoulders were slumped unceremoniously on his desk, it was hell. 

"Calm, do you think you can sit up and pay attention? We have a very important duty to perform."

Rang a melodic voice said by man standing at the front of the room. The man was tall, fit and handsome with long flowing blonde hair and a square, exquisite jaw. He was wise and experienced, able to dispense worldly knowledge on all worthy subjects, able to discuss philosophy to the highest level of consideration and providence. On a Terrestrial realm he would have been a immaculate lord or king, a figure of divine grace and worthy of adoration, however in the Grand Citadel, he was the manager of the "Department of Particulate and Remnant Matter disposal." 

He was also a jack-ass.

at least according to Calm, the younger man who was currently drooling on the metal desk in the back. Calm blinked twice and slowly raised his head, leaning back into his wooden chair.

"I am listening, I was listening the whole time. Although I am not sure if my brain has been comprehending everything.." He paused, then leaned back even further and grunted.

Calm was tired, and not just a little bit annoyed, mostly by being in the presence of the Beautiful man bespeeching him, but also slightly by the topic of the meeting. Soon would be the start of the annual Millennial Realm Games, a time of great excitement and endless delight. But it also means more work for people like him. For these games were special, all Gods were welcome to compete, from the highest of the high like those in the Council of Creation, grand figures like The Stone Father or The Lady of Life to even the most humble Titleless. 

In preparation for the games the Gods would be in a frenzy, testing and forming and molding their creations, for these games would be a competition not between gods, but between the creations of Gods, locked in mortal combat. Due to the divine effort and energy required to form new creations, disposal of failed creations had to handled with the utmost care and efficacy. With the sudden surge of new disposal needs, there was not enough care to go around, and definitely not enough efficacy. 

The Beautiful man at the front sighed and rolled his eyes, 

"Well please make sure your brain Is comprehending, I do not want a repeat of the last games, do I make myself clear?" finishing the man starred impatiently towards the back of the room.

Calm, cleared his throat before replying

"Yeah yeah.. I hear you." 

Apparently losing interest, the man in the front continued his droning and Calm put more effort into looking like he was paying attention, which he definitely was still not.

He was instead thinking about the last games, for he got on the radar of even the higher-ups, not in the good way mind you, Images of the dastardly squid filled his head. Tasked with rehoming the creature, Calm left him in a tank of water and went for lunch, only to return to the squid beating a hole into the side of the Citadel and escaping into the void. The high ups were not pleased, and it led to Calm having to spend centuries combing the void until everyone stopped caring.

Damned squid, are you even still alive out there?

after getting the thoughts of the creature out his mind, he returned to the task at hand, how was he going to assemble an army of the most terrifying and powerful creatures to win the games and finally ascend to a position worthy of his graces? But in order to assemble an army, he first needed to have access to an Creation Crucible, and even technically all Gods could use the communal crucibles for a fee, he didn't have the time or resources to do so, not to mention the extreme wait times to actually get in. 

He needed a plan.. no.. he needed a disguise! for due to his stunt, few would let him use any of the multitude of private crucibles available, and due to his assortment of previous debacles, few would not recognize him, because he was very recognizable.

Calm was not unattractive, but he was also not that attractive. He had flawless pale porcelain skin and a head of dark messy hair, his face was symmetrical and eyes large dark and tired looking, his body lithe and fit, by most accounts he would be a model of beauty and the divine. However, for a Gods standards, he was average at best, so average and unassuming in fact it all looped around to being the most assuming. Someone as unassuming as him had to be up to no good, and in the defense of someone who might think that, they were probably right. 

Where can I get a disguise though... he thought, and thought, not listening to the world around him.

Oh! Turn owes me a favour! That's it... Calms face distorted into a wicked grin, he then straightened up and made a fist

"Yes!"

he said a little too loud, which was a problem because he didn't actually mean to say it at all. Almost 2 dozen faces moved around the room glancing in his direction starring at him. 

"Uhh.." Calm said idiotically

"I just wanted to express.. my feelings of.. excitement.. for what we are talking about.."

which probably sounded even more idiotic, as they were currently discussing how to lead a Zorst to water. 

Note: A Zorst is a large creature with four leg like appendages, covered with fur and famously known for not wanting to go to water, even if it kills them. 

_____________________

Name: Calmbreeze

Title: Titleless

Position: Animate material removal technician 

Realm: Realmless

Abilities: Divine Soul, Divine Energy, Removal Dimension Certified, Forklift Certified

_____________________