"Ahhh—so satisfying!"
With a heavenly sigh of relief, Lin Han finally triumphed over a seven-day battle with constipation. It was like a divine miracle had occurred in his bathroom. Body and soul both liberated, he felt as if he had reached the pinnacle of human existence.
Twenty minutes later, he pulled up his pants, radiating a sense of inner peace. The world seemed unusually beautiful. The sky was bluer, the clouds fluffier, and even the faded "Please conserve toilet paper" sign on the door felt like it had a warm glow.
"That release deserves a five-star review."
Humming a tune, he hopped onto his beloved brand electric scooter and set off toward his pet shop like any normal day. But just as he rolled a few meters forward—
Boom!
The sky darkened, the ground trembled, and it felt like the universe had hit the shuffle button on time and space. Lin Han blacked out instantly.
"I JUST WENT TO POOP!"
He didn't even get the chance to curse before he collapsed face-first onto the pavement.
…
Who knows how long had passed?
When Lin Han slowly regained consciousness, everything was blurry—but not just his vision. His brain felt like someone had unzipped a massive, compressed file and dumped a truckload of bizarre data straight into his skull.
"Magic Beast?"
"Beast tamer? I can't even tame my husky!"
Rolling on the ground, clutching his head, Lin Han looked like a tortured soul in a tragic drama—except the only tragedy was his bowel movement.
Gradually, the information storm in his brain subsided, and the unfamiliar memories began to sort themselves into place. He lay there gasping, eyes wide with disbelief.
"I… transmigrated?"
"All I did was take a dump…"
"And now I'm in another world?!"
Still doubting reality, Lin Han sprang to his feet and dashed outside like a madman.
The street layout looked vaguely familiar, but everything else screamed parallel universe. The buildings were absurdly tall, as if architects were trying to high-five the clouds. But the most bizarre thing was the people.
Every single person, young or old, was accompanied by some strange creature:
—One guy had a fire-breathing cat with a flower tail.
—A granny was walking a bunny the size of a refrigerator.
—And a middle-aged uncle was riding a parrot doing stand-up comedy.
Lin Han stood frozen on the sidewalk.
"Am I in… some bootleg Pokémon world?"
"Was I… chosen by the Toilet of Destiny?!"
Trying not to panic, he got back on his scooter and zipped toward his pet shop. Despite all the weird mega-structures around him—some looking like monster nests—his little shop was still in the same spot.
"You reliable old buddy!" he whispered to his scooter, patting it affectionately.
He quickly unlocked the door, rolled up the shutters, and confidently shouted, "Another wonderful day begins—"
Then froze.
The store was empty.
Empty.
No pet food. No cat litter. No chew toys. No grooming tubs.
Even his beloved husky, who had been with him for seven years, was gone. All that was left was a gnawed-up sofa in the corner, seemingly mocking him with its tattered smile.
"Did someone… rob me while I was transcending dimensions?!"
Lin Han crouched down in silence, staring at the void where his business used to be. After a long pause, he muttered:
"All I did… was poop. And I lost an entire world."
"Crap, I've been robbed! I'm doomed, I'm so doomed!"
Lin Han almost coughed up blood on the spot.
But just then, a cold, emotionless mechanical voice echoed in his mind:
"Ding. Suitable host detected. Initiating soul compatibility test..."
"Test complete. Commencing fusion…"
"Fusion successful. System initializing..."
Lin Han froze.
"A system? You're giving me a cheat right after I transmigrated? What a warm welcome!"
He stood there dumbfounded for a second, then instantly got excited.
Knew it. These things are never absent—just fashionably late!
As a certified modern-day shut-in, Lin Han lived for gaming, binge-watching, and web novels. He was no stranger to this trope—system pops up, life changes forever.
Naturally, he jumped straight into questioning the system.
"What can you do? Do I get powers? Can I summon a dragon?"
"I am the Magic Beast Cultivation System. Objective: cultivate the most powerful magic beast in existence."
Lin Han's eyes lit up like he'd won the lottery.
"Oho! Now that's what I'm talking about!"
But then, the system dropped a bombshell:
"Scan complete. No spiritual energy detected in the host's body. The host is unable to become a beast tamer. Useless individual."
Lin Han's smile stiffened.
"Excuse me? Useless? I'm handsome, charming, and full of... vibes! You dare call me useless?"
He was just about to go on a rant when the system interrupted again:
"Activating Plan B. Please locate a store within 24 hours to complete system binding."
Lin Han blinked. "Store? That's easy. This pet shop is mine. Bind it."
"Binding in progress..."
"Binding successful. Constructing internal structure..."
"Cultivation room: established. Incubation pool: established. Magic Beast item shop: established."
Lin Han watched the interior of his store seemingly change in real time, jaw practically on the floor.
"Setup complete. Please choose one of the two available starter magic beasts. Within two days, you must increase its power by 300% and successfully sell it."
Lin Han gawked.
"Wait, 300% power-up and sell it in two days? What is this, 'Pokémon Tycoon: Hard Mode'?"
"Correct. Welcome to your new life: pet trainer by destiny, shopkeeper by force."
Lin Han sighed dramatically.
"Looks like I didn't just cross dimensions—I also unlocked a new career as a magical pet salesman."
As soon as the system finished speaking—BAM!
The front door of the shop slammed shut on its own, like some invisible force had sealed the place off.
Lin Han jolted in shock. When he turned around, he saw the pet grooming area—where he used to bathe cats and give dogs questionable perms—had transformed into a futuristic cultivation chamber with glowing panels and sci-fi vibes.
Next to it, the ordinary little pool had evolved into a shimmering incubation pond, bubbling softly like it was cooking up something magical (or dangerous).
However, the main hall, where pet food and supplies were once sold, was still emptier than a diet snack shelf during finals week. Not even a single dog biscuit in sight.
Lin Han stood there, questioning his entire existence.
"I… I just went to the bathroom… How did that turn into this?"
As he tried to make sense of the memories swirling in his head, one thing became clear:
In this world, raising the strength of a magical beast was extremely difficult. It took constant training, day after day, sometimes even involving complicated rituals or emotional bonding episodes.
And now the system wanted him to triple a pet's power in just two days?
That was straight-up fantasy nonsense.
With a dry laugh, he muttered, "Uh… what happens if I fail the task?"
The system replied with chilling calm:
"This task is part of Plan B. Failure will trigger Annihilation Mode. Host will be terminated, and all related individuals will have their memories erased."
"You will be effectively deleted from existence—as if you, and the poop that brought you here, never existed."
"… …"
Lin Han froze.
"…WTF. What kind of toilet-induced nightmare is this?!"
"You—you can't be serious! This task is impossible!" he shouted, voice cracking from panic.
"Warning: Detected severe verbal abuse toward the system. Initiating punishment protocol—slap mode: five hits."
"Wait, WHAT?!"
Before he could even finish yelling, a giant transparent hand made of pure energy materialized in front of him.
"SLAP! SLAP! SLAP! SLAP! SLAP!"
Five crisp, clean smacks echoed through the room. His face turned bright red, a perfect set of glowing fingerprints blooming across his cheeks like shameful battle scars.
His lips twitched. He wanted to curse again. Wanted to.
But seeing that floating ghost-hand still twitching in the air, he swallowed his pride and his profanity.
"…Can I, uh… maybe switch to a different task?"
Lin Han rubbed his burning face and gave a cheeky little grin, trying to look cute like some kind of anime protagonist.
"No. The task is non-negotiable," the system replied coldly.
"You—!"
"…Forget it. I'll give it a shot. Damn system…"
Lin Han grumbled like a grumpy NPC, then sighed dramatically.
"Fine. I accept the task. Now, where is the magical beast? Let me choose."
Just then, two beams of golden light shot down in front of him, followed by a burst of magical energy.
BOOM! BOOM!
Two strange-looking magical beasts suddenly appeared before his eyes.
Lin Han's eyes lit up like he'd just hit a jackpot on a claw machine.
"Here we go, here we go! My destiny starts now… Please, please don't be too cursed…"
After digging through his newly uploaded memory files, Lin Han finally got the lowdown on his "starter pack."
The first one was a Phantom Cat—black fur from head to tail, with a lone patch of white fluff on its chest, probably just for aesthetic balance. It was a wind-type magical beast, classified as low-tier trash (okay, the system called it "novice-friendly," but same thing). Even in its mature form, it only reached Tier 3 strength.
The second one was a Blazing Sun Sparrow—a teeny-tiny bird, no bigger than a fist, with red and white feathers that looked like it just flew out of a fire-themed anime opening. It was fire-type, equally low-tier, and would max out at Tier 3 no matter how many protein shakes it drank.
Lin Han stared at the two magical beasts, his expression darkening by the second.
"This is my cheat? THIS? Where's the overpowered dragon?! The world-ending war beast?!
Where's my protagonist treatment?!"
Left with despair and shattered expectations.
"…Whatever. I'll take the Phantom Cat." Lin Han muttered, lifeless.
"Magical beast selected. Initiating interdimensional rift to appropriate cultivation realm," the system replied emotionlessly.
Before he could even ask what the hell that meant—
ZzzzzzRRRRIPPP!
A glowing purple crack suddenly tore open in front of him, ripping space itself like it owed money. Lin Han jumped so hard he nearly screamed.
"Due to the host's first-time beast cultivation, the system will auto-match a suitable training realm," said the system, like it wasn't casually tearing open a hole in reality.
Frantically flipping through more memory files, Lin Han discovered a rather depressing fact:
In this world, beast cultivation wasn't just about feeding and walking them—it was about the environment.
Every top-tier beast shop had terrain-specific training grounds—lava pits for fire-types, waterfalls for water-types, entire jungles for grass-types... all ridiculously professional.
Then he looked at his store.
Barely enough space to turn around, let alone build a damn wind canyon.
"Scanning beast: Phantom Cat. Type: Wind. Suitable realm found: Gale Forest Highland Interface. Enter now?"
Lin Han blinked.
"Uhh... sure. Yeah. Enter."
As soon as the words left his mouth, the purple rift stretched wide open—like a vertical eye blinking ominously—then sucked him and the Phantom Cat in like a broken vacuum cleaner.
The world spun. Darkness swallowed him. His soul felt like it had been yanked out and reinstalled backward. His eyes couldn't even find the concept of "up."
Then... silence.
Slowly, his vision returned.
A vast ancient forest appeared before him—towering trees, wild green canopies, and a constant howling wind that made it feel like he had stepped into the middle of a shampoo commercial.
"Host has successfully entered: Gale Forest Highland Realm."
"Time limit: 2 days."
"During this period, the host will receive Absolute Defense as system protection."
Lin Han stood there, completely stunned.
"…Bro, what just happened?"
"Did I just… transmigrate again?!"
Lin Han looked around. Towering trees stretched high into the clouds, like nature's skyscrapers. The ground was overgrown with wild grass, and now and then, small, unknown creatures darted through the foliage. Above him, countless swirling wind vortexes spun slowly in the sky, creating a breathtaking and surreal scene.
"Ding! The host lacks spiritual energy and cannot form a standard contract with the magical beast. Granting a Temporary Contract Scroll."
With a soft chime, a golden scroll appeared in Lin Han's hand, shimmering faintly with a mysterious glow. It looked ancient, elegant, and most importantly, like something straight out of a fantasy game.
"…Uh, how do I use this?" Lin Han asked, utterly confused.
"The host must draw the formation depicted on the scroll using his blood, then place the beast in the center of the formation to complete the temporary bond," the system replied calmly.
Lin Han unrolled the scroll and saw a complex six-pointed star design—an arcane diagram filled with intricate lines and symbols. It practically screamed important and dangerous. He took a deep breath, bit his finger, and began carefully tracing the formation on the ground.
Fortunately, the soft soil and dense grass soaked up the blood quickly. Within minutes, the formation was complete.
"…Okay, where's the Phantom Cat?"
Just as Lin Han was about to place the creature in the center, he realized it had already scampered off and was now zooming excitedly in circles around a massive nearby tree, tail wagging like a tiny propeller.
Lin Han stared, speechless.
"Bro… I'm here doing blood rituals, and you're out there doing cardio?"
With a resigned sigh, he walked over and gently scooped up the hyperactive cat. Luckily, the Phantom Cat was extremely friendly and didn't resist at all. It even purred softly and rubbed its head against his hand like a spoiled house pet.
Placing it in the center of the formation, Lin Han took a step back.
The six-pointed star lit up instantly, glowing with radiant energy that rose from the ground like a holy beacon.
At the same time, Lin Han felt something warm spark in his mind—a glowing thread of connection forming between him and the Phantom Cat. Their souls were now linked, even if temporarily.
To his amazement, he could now sense the beast's emotions: excitement, curiosity, trust. It all washed over him like a gentle wave.
The Phantom Cat, too, had changed. It now stuck close to him, circling his legs, sniffing his scent, occasionally letting out soft "mews" as if to say, "So, you're my human now, huh?"
Lin Han looked down at his new companion.
Maybe… just maybe… this little black cat wasn't such a bad start after all.