"You just have to live quietly. Be obedient. Don't ask questions. Just live quietly. Don't raise your neck."
Kaizen has been told these words ever since he learnt to speak and understand what his mother was saying. His mother, the concubine of Emperor Alpheus, was someone with few words but she never forgot to remind those words to him. Like a mantra that had to be chanted everyday.
The royal court was a cruel place. Behind the smiles and glamour and friendly facade, everyone was trying to drag each other down. They were no different towards Kaizen. A second prince, forgotten easily and born from a concubine, people were thrilled to try pulling him down the moment he showed even a bit of fire and ambition.
But Kaizen was not stupid. He stayed quiet. He observed. He learnt. He knew there was no place for a child born from a concubine in the royal court. So he laid low. Stayed quiet. Acted as obedient as his mother told him to be. He did not have a problem with it. He didn't have a problem with the fact that he will never get the throne. His older half-brother, Caelus El Erindel, the son of the empress was bound to have the crown.
Kaizen never had a problem with it.
That was until she appeared.
"Hello my name is Camille. I am from the house of Astrid." A voice greets.
Kaizen was 13 years old then. But it was then when he first felt what greed was like.
She was as beautiful as the lilies during the dawn. Decorated by the dew that sparkled like gems. With dark long hair. Braided beautifully. A soft white dress.
"You are Prince Kaizen right?" She asks. Kaizen stares at her. He has never really been approached by anyone not without rotten intentions. But this girl, Kaizen couldn't see any ill intention. Not in her eyes nor in her smile.
"Yes I am Kaizen. Greetings Lady Camille." He greets, a little shyly and awkwardly.
"We are of same age. You can call me Camille." She says. "Do you want to be my friend? My father says I will be coming here often from now on. But I don't know anyone."
Kaizen feels dumbfounded. But he nods to her request.
"The maids are bringing food. Come on! We can eat together." She says, holding his hand and leading him towards the partially enclosed pavilion where sitting arrangements were made.
"I asked them for cakes and cookies. Do you like sweets? I like sweets but mother doesn't like it when I eat them." She says as she sits down fixing her dress.
She talks a lot. It is what Kaizen notes. But he doesn't find it bothersome. Just in time, the maids come out with tea and cakes and cookies. They look at Kaizen with a frown but doesn't say anything as they leave them be standing outside the pavilion instead.
For the first time Kaizen gets to eat with someone who wasn't his mother, that makes him feel welcomed. And the days after that Kaizen finds himself waiting for her arrival. They read together, they eat together and they talk together.
It was the first taste of joy he had felt. Without restrictions and he was obsessed.
Then time passes by fast and they turn 15. Camillie doesn't change much, in looks nor in behaviour or in manners. She stays the same. A constant that Kaizen cherishes.
Until it all changes.
"Mother says I will marry the crown prince." Camille breaks the news to him as they sit together in the garden.
"What?" Kaizen questions never expecting such news. His brother? To Caelus?
"When I come of age, I have to marry the crown prince one day. I have never talked with him. Is he nice?" she asked looking nervous. Kaizen doesn't know what to do beside nodding his head. His brother is nice. Nice enough for a royal blood that is.
"Are you close to your brother?" She questions picking on the grass.
"Not really." Kaizen answers.
"I hope he is nice to me too." Camille mumbles.
The same night Kaizen sits with his mother. His thoughts filled with Camille and his brother who was going to marry her. The thought made his heart burn. There was something so disturbing about it. The news had planted a seed of hatred towards his half brother, the crown prince.
"Mother. I think there is someone I like now." Kaizen says.
His mother stops reading the book she was holding looking up at him. "Who?" She questioned.
"Camille from the house of Astrid."
The words that came out of his mouth makes his mother drop her book. "Kaizen El Erindel. You will NEVER speak of that girl again. You will never mention that name. You will never talk to her from now on. Do you hear me?" She says, her tone stern and firm.
"I want her." He says.
Defiance. It is the first time Kaizen had showed such defiance. His mother stands up from where she was sitting walking towards him. "Kaizen she is going to be the crown princess. She is not a girl you can look at. Not a girl you can desire. Looking at crown prince's woman is no less than becoming a traitor." She warns.
Kaizen falls silent. Deep in thought. A fire lit up internally at her words. "What do I have to do to have her then?" He says. Not really expecting an answer.
"You have to be the crown prince." Her mother answered, finding her son's words ridiculous as of that moment.
Ah. That was the exact moment such a venomous thought was planted inside Kaizen. A crown prince.
"Kaizen." His mother's voice came in a warning tone knowing exactly what his son was thinking.
Kaizen doesn't listen to his mother. He stands up and walks out. Right before he steps out he turns back facing his mother.
"Mother. 15 years. I have never asked for anything. I have never wanted anything. I have never wanted the throne too. But her? If becoming the crown prince is what it takes to have her, then so be it." He says before turning around. A dangerous glint in his eyes that she has never seen in her son's eyes.
His mother falls on the ground the moment he closed the door behind him, worried over what his son might do. But at that moment, she realised how dull his son's eyes had always looked until today. The look in his eyes were dangerous. But oh so alive.