It was supposed to be a normal gym day.
But when you're the reluctant leader of a rapidly growing harem, and the school has launched a popularity contest where every girlfriend counts, even Phys Ed turns into full-scale romantic warfare.
🚨 SYSTEM ALERT
📢 School Broadcast:
"Welcome to Day 2 of the Harem Popularity Games!
Today's challenge: Inter-Harem Sports Competition!
Rules: No fatalities. Bruises allowed. Love encouraged."
Prizes: Public affection points, school rank bonuses… and snacks."
"Snacks?" I muttered, struggling with my gym uniform.
Lucina, ever the dramatic vampire-themed girlfriend, kicked open my locker with the flair of a stage villain. "Snacks and dominance, darling."
Nanami projected a 3D tournament bracket from her smartwatch. "You'll be competing against Kuro Renji's elite harem today. They're… efficient. And terrifying."
Haruka was already stretching like a demon in heat. "I'm gonna spike that smug sparkle-boy into orbit."
Sakura? Not even present. Just a kunai sticking out of a ceiling tile with a note dangling from it:
"Back before the bloodshed."
Liora adjusted her polished, gold-accented cleats. "Today, we assert dominance through glorious athletic conquest."
And me?
Still trying to find matching socks.
🔥 Round 1: Dodgeball – Chaos Formation Alpha
The gymnasium was full to bursting. Students pressed against the glass windows. Teachers gave up on control and started taking bets.
The crowd waved banners like we were gladiators:
TEAM HIRO: "Hugs Not Headshots!"
TEAM KURO: "Make Harems Great Again!"
One dude near the back: "Just Marry Me, Bro!"
The whistle blew.
The dodgeballs were live.
Kuro's harem was a marvel. Coordinated, elegant, synchronized like a K-Pop group trained in combat. Every throw arced like poetry. Every dodge glided like a waltz.
Our side?
Unfiltered chaos.
Haruka bellowed a battle cry and launched a dodgeball so hard it created a sonic boom. Lucina caught two balls barehanded, screamed something ancient in Latin, and hurled them back with divine fury.
Nanami, laser-focused, began predicting throws in real-time. Until she blinked, buffered, and got nailed in the side.
Sakura? Nowhere to be seen. Except when opponents started dropping mysteriously unconscious. No one saw her — but we felt her.
Liora clapped after each elimination like a queen watching peasants battle for her amusement. "Splendid. Commence Operation Royal Slam!"
And me?
I got hit in the face. Twice. Once by my own team.
🆚 Final Showdown: Hiro vs. Kuro
It all came down to just me and Kuro. Everyone else had been either knocked out… or had disappeared into the bleachers under mysterious circumstances (Sakura).
Kuro stood tall. Hair shimmering. Eyes burning with romantic arrogance.
"This ends now, Harem King," he said, spinning the dodgeball like it was sacred.
"Please, I don't even know where my lunch money is," I whispered.
He threw.
I tripped over my own foot, sneezed, and fell. His throw missed… and hit the referee.
The ref wheezed. Blew the whistle. Declared us the winners.
Somehow.
✅ Dodgeball Complete
Hiro's Team Wins
Reward: +10 Affection Points
MVP: Sakura (unconfirmed, but probable)
New Title Unlocked: "Accidental Champion"
⚽ Round 2: Soccer – Love Is War
Lucina popped her knuckles. "Time to end some bloodlines."
Nanami updated our score ahead of the game. "I hacked the scoreboard. Statistically, if they believe they're losing, they'll make more mistakes."
Haruka rolled onto the field in armor made of mop handles and desk chairs.
Liora… brought cheerleaders.
And Sakura appeared next to me, silently handing me water, then vanishing again. I swear, she has teleportation jutsu or something.
Kuro's team strutted onto the field in matching custom jerseys, glittering like runway models. They even had a theme song. With backup vocals.
The game started with chaos.
Haruka screamed "FOR LOVE AND FREE LUNCHES!" and bulldozed an opponent.
Lucina intercepted a ball mid-air with a spinning kick that probably defied six laws of physics.
Nanami used predictive algorithms to assist positioning, even controlling a drone that shouted her commands. She tripped, but the drone scored.
Liora… still hadn't moved. She barked royal orders like Napoleon directing a war.
Sakura stole the ball three times. Without ever being seen doing it.
Me?
I got tangled in the net, fell over, accidentally redirected the ball with my head, and somehow — miraculously — scored the final goal.
Again… somehow.
✅ Soccer Match Complete
Hiro's Team Wins
Rewards: Fan Club +1, Affection +10
New Title: "Chaotic Striker"
Rank Boost: Now #4 in the Harem Rankings
Bonus Item: A bento from Lucina (which may or may not contain garlic, roses, and questionable meats)
💤 Post-Match Aftermath
We collapsed on the field.
Haruka flexed her arms. "Victory smells like gym socks and divine justice."
Lucina was cleaning blood off her gloves. "They were formidable. And fragile."
Nanami ran a systems diagnostic on my body. "You have mild whiplash. Also, your heartbeat spiked when you looked at Lucina."
"Don't log that."
Sakura sat in a tree, peeling an orange like a sniper prepping her rifle.
Liora stood over me with a parasol. "Well done, fiancé. You continue to stumble upward with shocking grace."
And me?
Face-down on the grass, mumbling, "I just wanted to pass math…"
💘 New Confession Incoming…
A chill hit the field like a sudden blizzard.
The cheering crowd fell silent.
Standing at the field gate was a silver-haired girl. Impeccably dressed in a school disciplinary uniform. Her eyes glinted like steel. Her presence felt like a legal document hitting you in the face.
In her hand:
A massive wooden bat.
Written on it in bold kanji: "NO ROMANCE."
She walked with the weight of law. Students stepped aside. Flowers wilted. A volleyball combusted.
She pointed the bat at me.
"I'm Miyu Tensai," she said. "Chairwoman of the Student Disciplinary Committee."
She adjusted her glasses with clinical disdain.
"This—" she tapped the bat against the turf "—is a cease and desist. From love itself."
🚨 New Character Detected
Girl #007: Miyu Tensai
Role: Head of Student Discipline
Mission: Shut Down the Harem System
Personality: Ice Queen Tsundere
Secret Quirk: Addicted to romantic dramas. Might be enjoying this too much.
I sat up slowly, dusted off the dirt, and whispered to no one in particular:
"…I am so not emotionally ready for this."
One girlfriend closer to implosion.